Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Generic Maxims No. 11


1. The blows of life are softened by old friends... and old habits.
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2.The most ominous word in the language is probably... "mostly" as in :  Snakes are mostly non-poisonous.
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3. Living is a hereditary disease...
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4.  The Creator, after He made man and woman, decided to make the perfect animal...then He made the cat.
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"Yeah...I'm perfect, so what?"

5.  Time is Nature's way of making credit card payments ...possible.
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6. Of all the vices...charm is the most admired.
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7. If you have to go back to the drawing board on every project...you are probably better at drawing than projects.
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8. A good rule of thumb is...stop using your thumbs as a ruler.
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9. If you think the loss of your brain would be an irreplaceable loss to the world...start pickling it! 
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10. The best anti-depressant is... a poor memory.
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WHAT IF...
1. Your girl friend's ex-boy friend is your parole officer?
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2. The fossilized dinosaur bones you unearthed turned out to be... petrified Big Macs?
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3. You forget where you left your wife...not your keys?
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4. You are told at an "all-you can-eat" buffet that you have eaten enough?
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5. Pretty, pouting Pricilla, poured Perrier profusely over Paul's pale pate.


Go to www.mydailyaphorism.com for your daily fix by Nothingprofound.




10 comments:

TALON said...

Loved the tongue twister at the end, Count Sneaky!

And I laughed out loud at number two. I mostly thought mostly was mostly a silly adverb. I have new respect for it now, thanks to you. :)

雅俊芬凱陳許 said...

當一個人內心能容納兩樣相互衝突的東西,這個人便開始變得有價值了。............................................................

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Count Sneaky .. these are really interesting especially with the accompanying pictures ..

Fun - thanks - Hilary

Tony Single said...

But... if I pickle my brain, the zombies might get it! You don't want the zombies to get my brain, do you? :(

婉婷 said...

好棒的地方 我一定要常來~~~^^~..................................................................

蕙春蕙春 said...

希望我的支持可以帶給你快樂--加油.............................................................

淑蔡承均dgd周真淑ii淑 said...

量力而為,別勉強了,Cut your coat according to your cloth...................................................................

Kim said...

The best anti-depressant is a poor memory-- by the time I got to that one, I realized I was laughing out loud. But, then again, I'm slow. :) Generic Maxims No. 11 has cured my hangover. And I thank you.

于倫 said...

Drive carefully. It is not only cars that can be recalled by their Maker.............................................................

林秋萍林秋萍 said...

i consder your artical is so nice!............................................................