SPRING ODE
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Spring has sprung,
The leaves are hung,
Everything's turned to green,
And birds have started to preen.
And I'm waiting for my phone to rung.
Sturdley Shinglehammer
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1. No one starts from scratch...except chickens.
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2. Remember, nobody can touch your
thoughts or dreams.
3. Keep an eleven-foot pole for...those things
you wouldn't touch with a ten-foot pole.
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4. Being the subject of criticism is like being
the bug...on someone else's windshield.
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5. If you believe in love at first sight...
You'd better wear a blindfold when
you go out.
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6. Remember... You are an equal
opportunity sinner
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7. People who mean well...are a clear
and present danger.
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8. Pull over and let that passing fancy...
have the road.
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9. Everyone my age is an adult...
but not all are grown-ups.
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10. If you think marriage will broaden you...
it will exceed your expectation by
many pounds.
Our roving correspondent for Whatever, Kimmie Jimbel, sends this report from Wordpress City.
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The Woodchopper's Ball was held last Saturday at the new Smiggley-Ritz Hotel.
Ten new Debutante Woodchoppers were presented to the members along with eight Junior Debutante Woodchoppers during a lavish dinner which featured Pheasants a la Flamande, Capon a la Godord and Salade de Grouse a la Soyer (accent marks are needed here somewhere). The Dinner Program featured selections from the
"Sound of Music" and "Hop" by Miss Tina Tingle and Miss Lucille Liplock. Miss Tanya Barnsworth was named Queen of the 2011 Woodchoppers Ball and was presented by Senator Barfley Bodine, who then made a rather long ( read borinnggg) presentation featuring his new book, followed by election of officers. Mr. Mal Factor was elected Big Woodchopper, Mr. Jerome Jerms was elected Assistant Big Woodchopper and the other positions were, mercifully, quickly filled. Music for dancing and dining was provided by "Leo" Fortnightly and his Lyrical Lions. An evening of dancing concluded with a brunch at the Smiggley-Ritz Dining Room and French Snack Bar. Needless to say, a good time was had by all...so I won't.
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"Man is the Reasoning animal. Such is the claim. I think it is open to dispute.
MARK TWAIN
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No civilization can be perfect until exact equality
between man an woman is included.
MARK TWAIN
***
***
WHAT?
"That's not a lie; it's a termanological inexactude."
"That's not a lie; it's a termanological inexactude."
ALEXANDER HAIG /1983
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UMMM... YEAH.
UMMM... YEAH.
"Capital punishment is our society's recognition of
the sanctity of life."
ORRIN HATCH /1988
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SO WILL MOUSETRAPS?
SO WILL MOUSETRAPS?
"Nuclear powered vacuum cleaners will probably be a
reality in ten years."
ALEX LEWYT/ 1955
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Strutz the Cat, blog mascot:" Spring is here...so?"
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HOLD YOUR APPLAUSE PLEASE!
HOLD YOUR APPLAUSE PLEASE!
I am pleased to announce the newest blog on the block,
THE COUNT SNEAKY BRONZE AWARD FOR WHATEVER.
It will be awarded(?) from time to time to anyone I deem worthy for
reasons of my own. There are no requirements whatsoever.
You might, if you like, write an acknowledgement or a decline of award statement, or nothing at all, if you prefer. The first recipient of the
Award is my friend, Gary Phillip Pennick of "Klahanie. blogspot.com"
for being Gary, a good friend!
for being Gary, a good friend!
Huzzah!
(APPLAUSE)
(APPLAUSE)
***
CopyrightHTStone2011
