Sunday, March 21, 2010

1. A thing of beauty is a joy forever... at least
until the divorce.
2. It takes a heap of money to make a garbage
dump into a landfill...
3. Nothing becomes a woman more than a sense
of humor...nothing becomes a man like a job.
4. My friend tried to sell me a rehab camp for
overweight sumo wrestlers...
5. Don't part with your illusions...they took a lot of
work to build.
6. Strive for excellence... but settle for getting by.
7. Find some good in everything...even your relatives.
8. Opportunity knocks softly...but carries a big stick.
9. Keep success as your own...but spread the blame
around as far as it will go.
10. If you have any unmet dreams...don't ask me
 for an introduction.
11. If your eraser outlasts your can spell.
12. True beauty needs no make-up... but it doesn't hurt.
13. Happiness doesn't consist of things...unless,
of course, you don't have any.
14. If you're buying happiness on the installment plan...
don't miss a payment.
15. If you think you probably need a
 second opinion.
16. Hang loose. Fly low. Pass quickly.
17. I found some time I lost last week...along with
my keys.
18. Live well. Live long. Lie only occassionaly.
19. Don't let other people bring you down to
their might enjoy it.
20. Fighting fire with fire means... you might
get burned.
21. If you shoot yourself in the foot...sit down
before you shoot again.
22. I got good grades in school...and even better
from teach after school.
23. Love one will give your relatives
nothing to talk about.
24. I need 911. What's their phone number.
25. I thought I had what it takes...until they took it
 from me.

1 comment:

nothingprofound said...

"Strive for excellence...but settle for getting by."

Love that one!