Thursday, June 17, 2010

Generic Maxims No. 8



1. A good rule of thumb is
about 2 1/2"
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2. Some marriages are made in Heaven...but unfortunately lived out on Earth.
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3. Women in love aren't foolish... just men who think they are.
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4.Never argue with someone who has...made up both of your minds.
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  5. Pride goeth before a fall... and always travels First Class.
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6. Remember...never skate on thin skin.
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7. If you think your brain will be an irrepplaceable loss to humanity...start pickling it.
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8. The mark of the amateur husband is that...he has to read the manual or the map first.
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9. Bigamy is not allowed... because no man can serve two masters.
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10. Listen to that little inner voice inside...it's your inner child and it needs its diapers changed.
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ALIEN?
We received the following eye-witness engraving from a Mr. Hedley S. Pferdefuss who says that it is an alien from outer space that landed in his cornfield last month and left him with instructions to escape the coming end of the world, or at least some aspects of it like the price of corn. Pferdefuss offers to make his account and engraving available to any newspaper other than his hometown paper, "The Corn Belt Gazette," with whom he has had a running feud for several years. Our vast research department, headed by Ms. Minerva Fussebuckete, found this so-called alien really came out of the"Sturdley Horseless Carriage" catalog for this year and far from an outer-space alien, it shows the latest in fashionable attire for the drivers of the new-fangled horseless machines that are starting to appear on our highways and by-ways. Nice try Hedley!
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Go to http://www.mydailyaphorism.blogspot.com/aphorism.blogspot.com for your daily fix by Nothingprofound.
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"Oh that was a ding-clinkin' doozy, Clyde!"
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4 comments:

允輝允輝 said...

It is never too late to learn. .................................................................

Tony Single said...

Count, I do so enjoy coming here. I have a big grin on my face now that just won't quit. Thank you!

Can I just ask... did you do all of these illustrations for your blog? They are masterful. I wish I was even half the craftsman that whoever created these obviously is! :)

TALON said...

No. 4 was so appropriate for me today - having butted heads with someone who ALWAYS has the right answer (even when they're wrong).

I loved the "alien" tale, Count Sneaky! That was quite the get-up back in the day!

洪筱婷 said...

好的blog需要我們一起努力!.................................................................